Babbleing/Venting

[Maoman1]

It seems tonight that no matter what I say, It is wrong. I just made another member of this site feel horrible about a touchy subject and I also said something while I was on the phone with my girlfriend that has her in an "I don't care anymore" kind of mood. Just when things were looking up, I get kicked in the stomach by my own mouth. Ugh, I feel HORRIBLE!!!:cry::cry::cry:

[David]

We all put our foot in it from time to time Maoman.If you think you have done the wrong thing then simply apologise. If you don't think you've done the wrong thing then just leave it or ask the person who you upset what it was that upset them.

[silvana]

I think the computer and the phone can be inhibitors to what you really want to say its like some of what you mean to say gets lost in the equipment......I am a really funny person....generally......but I don't think you would ever know that on here....
As for you upsetting your girlfriend......try sorry or instead of second guessing why not ask her whats wrong it could well be a culmination of a lot of things. Or something you both can fix.
My ex frequently upset me on the phone, in the lounge, in the kitchen in the car ...gee I guess that why he is my ex......Just kiddin!

[irish223]

Ugh, I feel HORRIBLE!!!:cry::cry::cry:

DON'T!! You asked a legitimate question without assigning any blame. Besides, after rereading the entire thread, I don't believe the situation is credible. You didn't offend anyone, you just provided more fodder for the troll. :)

[Xoldog]

Dude its all good just chill and feel free let the love keep flowing and just be yourself. Dont worry about what the others think just let it be and like I said let the love flow and they will love you back.:):):):)

[Dhe Poet]

I don't know that there is anything i could say that would make you feel better. Mostly it sounds like you feel you did wrong. Like it had been said simply apologize if you feel sorry and you will feel better even if you don't get the results you were looking for. She like many others could just be an x and if she accepts you as human perhaps the two of you will be able to move forward. I'm married ten years and still err when it comes to what others think i should have done or said or what have you. To err is human to forgive devine is how the saying goes. Make peace for yourself. Good luck!

[Maoman1]

Ok. I found out what was wrong with my girlfriend. She recieved an email from her ex-boyfriend who she broke up with on the 07-08 new years. He is 24 and she is 17. Please don't judge her, she didn't think about what she was doing at the time. Anyways, in the email, he told her that he still loved her. After more than a year of being apart, this guy still wanted to marry her. They only dated for a month before she ended it with him. I was talking to her on the phone and metioned last year, (which seems to be our favorite subject... I might post why later) and I brought up the whole thing. She was fine until she checked the email. She absolutely hates the guy because he was trying to pressure her to go too far.... She is also angry at herself for not realizing the problems with the guy earlier. I helped her through most of that last year and now this guy is starting to re-enter her life. She is trying to pushing him out, and I am going to help her through this. Sorry if I got kinda off topic, my meds wore off and now I can't keep a straight mind set... We will get through this thing together again. I'm sure of it.:gabby::gabby::gabby:

[Boxcar]

That can be a difficult situation. I'm glad you're there for her.

My advice would be to not let this guy have any power. Don't open e-mails or texts. Block his number. Don't take his calls. Some guys will play with your head. It can be hard, but you can't let them touch you. It may make her feel crazy not knowing what he's saying, but that is what it may take. (She might not be curious like that. I don't know.) You could screen the stuff for her if she wants that option.

Any response can be fed upon by the guy. It may just give him more fuel.

[Maoman1]

She already took some of those steps last night, but I will tell her the rest. This guy has already tried playing with her head and it almost got her... he stood in front of a train and one of his friends pushed him out of the way, (or so the story goes...) but it had a bad effect on her. This happened before we started dating, but she is still kind of struck about it. A few friends and I have made a lot of progress on bringing her out of that mindset where she almost went back to him. This year, she is almost completely un-affected by him, but last night got to her. Things were great today though, so no permenent damage, but I will keep a close eye on her behavior. I don't want to see her like I had to last year.

Thanks.

[Maoman1]

I'm not the only one here that can vent. It feels kind of wierd seeing as I am the only one that is, others can too...

Forgot to tell you this. Both my girlfriend and I are movig to new houses. I am moving out of district to Peyton (Addict might know where this is) but I am going to the same school. She is moving down the street from where she is now.will add more later...

[lynn bambusch]

Wait a minute....."she is 17",....."They dated for a month"....."he stood in front of a train and one of his friends had to push him out of the way"...you can't be serious. Get her some counseling on self-esteem, and next time let the train hit him.
Seriously, this is all teen drama. He is a control freak and she needs to figure out why she was attracted to that type in the first place.
This type of drama can totally consume your life, and hers. Leave it behind, do some volunteer work at the food bank, or the soup kitchen, it feeds your soul and you learn what is really important in life.
Just my opinion, good luck.

[Boxcar]

On the topic of venting:

I've had my little temper tantrums too. If you look back to my posts around May/June of last year, you may see a few of my replies to some people. I think that was around there...

On self esteem:

I don't neccessarily think that self-esteem is always a factor in these types of situations. Some people are very minipulative and play with your head. It isn't a lack of loving the self that causes it. People who strive to control others know how to locate a person's suseptiblities. Everyone has them. These areas are subsequently used to control the other person. It may not be a lack of self-esteem. It could be a previous life experience, a nurturing personality, a desire for a thrilling relationship, believing there are no other options, ect. It might even be the belief in one's own ablities to change others for the better. That could be consider almost too much self-esteem.

[Maoman1]

I just wrote a long friggen message and the stupid "the internet has had a problem and needs to close" thing popped up.:angry: Then I did it again, and it logged me out but I was smart and copied it every so often. :D

We have a notebook that we write in,(we are both shy, and can write our thoughts better that we can speak them), and we have been talking about our story of last year and this year together.

It isn't a self esteem issue. She is going through so much right now in her life. Her step-dad, Her brothers, Her sister, the fact that She is moving, the fact that I am moving, school papers, and the stupid, selfish, contolling, perverted DONKEY! (or another word for it...). This is all teen drama, I admit that, but most of it is coming from the guy who hasn't been a teen in five friggen years. Sadly, I am serious, no matter how farfetched it sounds. She turned 17 after the fact of them dating, so She was actually 16 when She was dating him. We have been best friends since November of last year. I was basicly Her counsiler, confidant, and advice-giver. I told Her how I felt about that guy, (I have a good judge of character, or so I am told), and She took all I said to heart. Slowly, She started to notice what I was talking about, and then he decided to try to go farther. They got in a car with his friends and went to a store. All the friends said that they would be right back, so he decided that they should wait in the car. She was texting me at this time and told me all of this. He was getting annoyed at Her for texting me when he wanted Her to pay attention to him, so he grabber Her phone from Her hands, texted me on Her phone that She wouldn't be answering the phone for a bit, and kept the phone away from Her. Later She told me what happened after that. She got her phone and ran from him for a few reasons which should be secret. This got me so fired up I almost called the police...The only thing that kept me from doing it was the fact that She really needed me to be there for Her. She later broke up with him on new years and he didn't take it well. That is when the whole train thing happened. During and after that whole ordeal, I was there for Her, no matter what time, day or night, and that was when we fell in love. We didn't tell eachother our feelings until this year in November. Kinda wierd that it happened like this. There are a few rough spots when he tries to get into Her life again, but I'm keeping her as happy as anyone could be. She has no idea how happy I am with Her. There isn't a word that describes how I feel. Wow... I sure did get a lot out even though I had to restart...:gabby::gabby::gabby:

[bigdillpickle]

Maoman, others may say it's teen drama, but what you and she are dealing with is awfully real. Frightfully real. Dangerously real. That guy is trouble. Part of being there for her will be to make the call to the police the next time he assaults her or threatens to assault her. (Okay, I'm making a leap in assuming that, but I've known guys like you've described, and if it hasn't already happened, it may be coming one of these days.) She may be mad at you initially for it, but you will both get through it and be better off for it. It's a good thing she has someone like you to lean on!

As for upsetting someone on the boards, don't worry about it. Happens all the time on online forums, because we can't infuse our tone of voice, our body language, or our facial expressions into typed messages. I've been on here only briefly and can see that you have a heart of gold. I think everyone else probably thinks so, too. If something you said was taken the wrong way, it was just a mistake.

I'm responding days after you last wrote on this thread, so I hope everything has been going okay in the meantime.

[Maoman1]

I haven't heard anything about him for a while, so things on that end are ok for now. I don't have long on the comp so I will keep things short. As I have said before, we both are moving at the same time to different places. She is staying nearby, but I am moving to a new district about 1 hour from school. I am still staying in this school, but its about 80 miles round trip. She is not happy because we haven't had any alone time together in awhile. I have tried to get her parents to let her take a break for a bit so we can be alone, but they won't let her. I got to go for now, but I will be back soon.

[Maoman1]

Again, I don't have much time to write. After school yesterday, She was in a deep depression mode where she was null to the world. Both Her friend and I did everything we could to get Her to smile, but it didn't last long. She kept going back. She just needs a break from her family and this whole mess of packing and moving. After I got home from walking Her to where Her parents pick her up, (She lives about 3-4 miles away), I started to text Her to Her phone from yahoo, (I don't have a working phone), and She was in a WAY better mood. She gets to have Sunday off to do whatever She wants, and She chose to have the alone time with me that we so desperately need. (Don't worry, we don't do what other teens our age do when they are alone. We aren't dumb.) She is in such a great mood that I can't help that I am smileing right now just thinking of her. I gotta go, but before I do, I have to say a few things.

1. I will get back to you bigdill, I just haven't had time to write anything big like that lately. I am packing at my house right now, and it is calling for my full attention. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten.

2. I know that this site will be of good use with all of you at this site, so I am going to give you a link. This site gives away free downloads daily of up and coming products that could cost more than 50 dollars after the fact. It could be anything.

Giveawayoftheday.com (http://www.Giveawayoftheday.com)

"...There is also a game give away part, you'll have to find that. Only on weekends, though.
A lot of stuff is just eh, but occasionally you'll find something awesome. :p So just check it each day." This is what my friend told me, but I have yet to find it...

[Maoman1]

Ok, I am officially moved with the internet up and everything. An update on how things are going: Me and my girlfriend couldn't be better. We spend a lot of our time at school together, and we spend the night at eachother's house occasionally,( Don't worry, seperate rooms), and life is great right now, minus one thing. My sis has a new boyfriend. This kid seemed ok at first, but he reminds my mom of the only boyfriend she ever regreted dating, and he reminds my girlfriend of her ex, the 21 year old. I have a bad feeling about this guy. He is getting too comfortable with my girlfriend and my mom, which is making them uncomfortable, and my sis doesn't even notice. She is so mad at me and my girlfriend. We are trying to warn her of what might come, but she won't listen... Other than that, things are perfect.