teacher bashed by parents

[janarosana@chartert]

How do I regain my diginity and reputation after a few parents were not happy with their child's test scores?
No one wants to be the teacher that no one wants for their child.
What can I do?

My principal is supposedly on board and is giving her support.

[irish223]

I'm sorry that you're going through that. I've seen it happen in my school too.

I think the only thing you can do is hold your head high, and continue to be the best teacher you can. You may have a few vocal malcontents, but I'm sure there are many other parents who are happy that their children were in your class. You may never hear from them, but other parents will. Often, those vocal parents are not as well regarded as you fear.

The year is almost over. Next year will be better!

[Oak Tree]

How did your students do overall?

[jsfowler]

I have said it on this site before and I will say it again...

I would love my job if it were not for parents!

You just have to learn to let it go...I know easier said than done. The thing that bothers me about your post is you said administration is backing the parent!?! Now that has never happened to me. It sounds like you do not have administrative support and that is the downfall of any school system. How easily would it be for you to find a new job? Start looking.

[Chef Dave]

How do I regain my diginity and reputation after a few parents were not happy with their child's test scores?


I think this is an unfortunate example of the old adage, "You can't please everyone all of the time."

No matter what you do, there will always be people who complain.

If by "a few" you mean 1-3, I really wouldn't worry about this. Disgruntled parents sometimes go with the job. Teachers are regretfully an easy target for parents who need to vent because of other problems they may be having in their lives. Some parents are also simply contrary. If you give homework, it's either too much or too little. If a kid got an 85 on a test, he should have gotten at least a 90 etc.

If by "a few" you mean half or your class or more, then yes, this would be a source for concern ... especially if other teachers on your grade level weren't having this problem.

[pooker]

If all your students did bad I believe in curve, if just a few did bad don't let it affect you. Parents seem to have the mentality that there kid is always right, I could have the perfect teacher and come home and tell my parents that I deserved a 100 when I made a 50 and they would believe me. The best thing you can do is not act like it affects you, as bad as this is to say, some students get excited out of seeing there teachers in distress.

Best of Luck!

[seastarmath]

I have ninety math students for the EOG. Thirty five failed. One would expect most of them to fail as they never do their homework, write notes or practice during class. and refuse to do the little thing that would help them help themselves, like picking up a pencil or looking in a book, or in their notes if they bother to take them. My team got all the inclusion kids, all the ESL kids, all the 504 plan kids, and more students who failed the EOGs last uear than the other two teams put together. The other teams only had seven faillures each. I feel like a real loser, despite my national board certificaiton, training with the Sisters of Charity, and years of experience. I should have been able to do something. I missed my chance. I feel low enough about that, but I know the back biting, need to feel superior parents are going to have a hey day. Oh welll Must keep my medication handy for a few days, and start praying they evenly distribute the kids better next year.

If any young teachers are feeling nervous about parents bashing you, don't be. It means you are doing your job. It would be so wonderful if everyone loved you, but if that happens, somebody is getting away with something.:o

[Oak Tree]

If any young teachers are feeling nervous about parents bashing you, don't be. It means you are doing your job.

Not always but that's often true. I was really aggressive this year not allowing my students to waste time or disturb others but as a result a lot of parents demanded my students be switched to another class. They would prefer their children be allowed to waste their time if it avoids confrontation, I think. Ideally, I would be able to inspire my students in more creative ways but then again I am kind of old-fashioned about it. I believe that ultimately, in order to become an educated person you have to grind it out and do the work. I'm not sure I believe that anybody can make it fun all the time. But still I know I need to be open to strategies that teachers more successful than me use. It's tough finding the right balance. I for one am thankful for standardized/state testings because I think it's a good measure for whether I need a major overhaul or just minor adjustments.

[Boxcar]

Hang in there! :)

[dtrim]

Hello. I'm a former high school teacher who is now an education journalist working for Magna Publications, a well known higher education publisher. I'm writing about secondary education for a new online publication that will launch this August.

I'd love to interview some of you about your difficulties with parents for an article I'm writing.

If you're interested in an interview, please send me a private message.

Thanks and have a great summer!

Diane

[Karenrbw]

A couple of years ago, an irate parent accosted school officials because her twins were not selected for membership in the National Honor Society. They had to be voted in by a majority of the faculty, base on citizenship, character, etc. These boys have been pains since elementary school and were recently involved in an altercation with law enforcement. The NHS advisor had to resubmit the ballots, numerous times, until they got enough votes to be selected. What a crock!

[Boxcar]

Ugh. That is not right at all. The parent should have used the experience as a "learning lesson" for the twins rather than set such a bad example.

[seastarmath]

I feel much better reading the posts you all have given here. Thank you! I don't feel alone anymore.

[hweber]

Parents can be such a help or such a hindrance. It is so hard to know how to respond to parents sometimes. There are some that won't let their child serve a detention, even though it is warranted, and what lesson does that send to the child. My mentor told me, "Just think you don't have to live with them when they are teenagers!"

[teacher5]

:punch:You and your colleagues got a raw deal if they stacked your classes with all the students with special needs. If there were 90 students and 35 failed, 55 passed. Good job. You can only take students from where they are to the next level. If they don't come to you prepared, and you have to shove curriculum into them which they can't handle, plus they have special needs; I think you did a great job. More than half passed. We live in a new world where everyone is expected to pass and be happy. As a principal once told me, keep the kids happy, and the parents happy, and I will be happy with you. The sad thing is that this practice is becoming more of the norm. My fear is that some of these kids and their parents are going to face a reality check one day, and then what.

[hweber]

I am just glad that I won't be around for the reality check!! That will be a rough time.

[teach4560]

Teaching is so hard these days. Do your best that's all you can do! Did your other students do ok on the test. Take a deep breath this summer and go back in with a fresh I can do it attitude!

[coco2]

I went through something similar this year. The parents would come in screaming and yelling that I was incompetent and inconsistent. They would call every parent in the class to find out what their child's grades were on the tests. They trashed my name and my reputation all over this small town. I teach in a small private school, so keeping the parents happy is a high priority. The principal at first wanted to placate them, but after a while it was obvious that this was harassment. Thankfully, she told them that " Mrs. M. was no longer a topic of discussion." They went so far as to complain to the school board. We have a new principal this year, so who knows what will happen this year.

Hang in there!

[teacher5]

Coco2- Sometimes things happen for a reason. No one should go through what you went through. I am glad that the principal finally put a stop to the harrassment at the building level. Were there any repercussions from the school bd. Usually, they follow the lead of the principal because they are not educators and never visit classes or schools when in session. Hopefully, new leadership means a change for the better. Good luck!